I'm not blaming my parents for our scarcity,far from it.My parents were just farmers and with seven children to feed,it's sure hard to make ends meet.We were thankful that we had shelter over our heads.And when my eldest brother got married and had a child,well,more addition of mouths to feed.Now,looking back,I felt that we were luckier than most because we never went to bed hungry.My parents priority were feeding us.They worked hard for that purpose and thanks to them,we've never known hunger.We had three whole meals everyday and we can eat whenever we felt hungry.Most important of all,we could eat rice everyday and that was considered a luxury in those days.We always had the 3 basic foods whenever we had our meals that is rice,vegetables and fish,salted of course,and sometimes we had those bland tasting dried anchovies.Some of my friends then rarely had those.Most eat only sweet potatoes,yam or tapioca .They rarely had rice or fish.
My parents were a strong believer in hard work.Every single one of the family members had to pitch in to help as long as they were able.The elder children would help in the fields or being given the task of collecting firewood.The younger ones would help with the housework or looking after the toddlers.Even fetching water was a full day's work since we had to fetch it from a source quite far from the house itself.Indoor plumbing? - well,again,dream on!

I've heard it said and read about it often enough that if you really want something,you'll get it eventually even if you have to wait for a long time to achieve it.Prayers, honesty,perseverance and hard work will pay out in the end.
When I started school and learn how to read,that's when I began to dream,so to speak.I've always been fascinated with books so I was very happy when I finally can read one.I remembered my favourite subject in Primary School,the Hygiene,where there were many pictures of houses with beautiful kitchens,bathrooms and bedrooms in its textbook.I never tire looking at the pictures and dream that I'd live in house like that one day.
I was especially fascinated with the bathrooms and kitchen stove pictures.Maybe it was because in our house then there were no bathrooms.No indoor plumbing,only an outhouse which was built quite far from the house so as to avoid the smell.You wouldn't want to go there alone at night!As for the kitchen stove - well,never seen like that in real life before,only in books!In our house we used firewoods.Gas stove?Dream on..

Who'd want to buy???

I didn't realize how much junks was accumulated in my own household until a friend lamented recently that she's out of storage space for all the unused junks.It's then that I saw all the broken down radio,cellphones and charger,computer monitor,keyboards,mouse (or shall I call them mice since there are plenty),printer,voltage regulator,hair dryer,iron,rice cooker,blender,washing machine,you name it,it's there.I can set up shop !
If only I can sell these back,even for a fraction of their original prices.It made me ponder.30 years ago many wouldn't know what all these are.Well,maybe the radio,yes,but the others?Even a gas stove is unheard of in many households then...

It's not laziness....

When my children were little,rain or shine I have to get up early to get everything done.When they were of school age,all the more reason to wake up early or they'll miss their bus.But now I can afford to laze around and stay in bed because I don't have to prepare breakfast for anybody but me anymore.

That's one of the good things of being alone in the house.I can stay in bed as long as I like,cook only when I feel hungry and do chores whenever I feel like doing it.I can do household chores even late at night because I won't be disturbing anybody.

Sometimes when I don't have the mood to go out or do anything,I'll just curl in my favourite sofa with a book ,still in my nightie and nobody will see me.I can also afford not to do the laundry everyday because there's no more school uniforms to be washed.

Am I lonely?

Well,I don't feel lonely.I might be alone in the house but I never feel lonely.
Maybe it is because I don't think myself as alone.My youngest daughter asked me once,how can I stand being alone.I said to her that I am not alone.I have my family with me.But we are not with you all the time,she insisted.Oh,but you are,I said to her.You are with me all the time,in my heart.
But then I began to ponder myself,what it will be like 20 or 30 years from now?When I really am an old woman?Will I be lonely then?
A friend even asked me once the feeling of being alone.Do I feel 'out of sorts'? I said no,it's as usual only that I have to cook less,just enough for me and the dog.But she too persisted.What will you do when your back got itchy,who will scratch it for you?And I told her,'the bathroom wall'.

Single Mum?

Single Mum?Well,that's me.I had my children when I was quite young.I had my firstborn when I was only 19 and my youngest when I was 29.I'm calling myself a single mum because even though I have a husband and my children a father,he's seldom home.He gave me the money and the rest is up to me.

When they were sick,I look after them and bring them to see a doctor.When they started schooling,it's me who sent them.When there's a PTA meeting , it's me who went.When they needed disciplining,it's me who conduct them.When they needed a friend I'm the only one around.

Everyday I say a prayer for them to be good and dutiful children.I am thankful because well,they are good children,did well in their studies and they have became my friends.

Now,two of my children are already employed.The third one is in her final year at the university and the youngest will be sitting for her SPM this year.

My children are now grown and not living with me anymore.Even my youngest is staying at the school hostel.Me,I am alone most of the time because my husband,their father, is seldom home.And me, I am a single mum , aren't I?

Chicken and Vegetable Stew (Saucochi di Gallinja)

1 (2 1/2 to 3 pound) broiler-fryer chicken, cut up
6 cups water
2 tablespoons instant beef bouillon
2 medium tomatoes, chopped
2 medium onions, chopped
2 medium potatoes, cut into 1/2-inch slices
2 medium sweet potatoes or yams, cut into 1/2-inch slices
3 ears sweet corn, cut into 3 pieces
1/4 pound winter squash, pared and cut into 1/2-inch pieces (1 cup)
1/2 cup fresh or frozen green peas
1 small hot chile pepper, stemmed, seeded and sliced
2 teaspoons salt
1/4 teaspoon pepper
Chopped chives

Heat chicken, water and bouillon to boiling in Dutch oven; reduce heat. Cover and simmer 30 minutes. Skim off fat. Add remaining ingredients except chives. Heat to boiling; reduce heat. Cover and simmer until thickest pieces of chicken are done and vegetables are tender, about 20 minutes.

Garnish each serving with chives.

Yields 8 or 9 servings.